Extramarital Affairs

DETESTING EXTRA-MARITAL AFFAIRS


Amazingly, I woke up one fateful morning and found myself smiling for no reason. A mood that ushered me into a moment of thorough meditation. Initially I was enjoying the scene; but lately, I discovered I was almost losing my sanity. Frankly speaking, till now I find it very difficult to fathom what precisely constituted that period of amusement at that early hour of the day. Needless to say, deep inside my system lies a fathomless fear in respect to the aforementioned mysterious scenario. Nevertheless, we shall continue to thank God and as well present Him with eulogies due to the life and strength He has given to us considering the fact that millions of people out there are lying helplessly and hopelessly.

If a close look is not given to the above paragraph, it stands to be meaningless to most of us. But I seize this opportunity to inform you that, that very paragraph represents the most important phase of this critique/edition. In essence, the paragraph is trying to tell us that some of the actions we indulge in on a daily basis is mysterious. In other words, such actions are being instituted or initiated by nature without our individual consent. You may not really comprehend where I’m actually driving at unless you join the school of thought known as “Realism”.

You will bear me witness that I’ve written on marriage. In my previous work on marriage, I categorically made it clear that it remains the oldest institution on earth. I also said that it’s an institute being instituted by God Himself, therefore ought to be seen by all and sundry as a sacred organization. Then if truly that such union is sacred, therefore it should be regarded as sacrosanct.

It’s quite appalling that the above union/institution has been abused greatly by those involved. Pathetically most people have turned it into a place for mere jamboree as if it’s an arena meant for social clubbing. Each time I see or set my eyes on such set of people, I smile with my jaws widely open. Yes instead of weeping, I’ve chosen to go by smiling. Well, my duty and paramount interest for today’s edition is to redirect most of us who has been abusing or intend to abuse this holy union called marriage.

I want to use this avenue to put up a fact that may be peculiar to us. It’s only by the special grace of the Almighty that one finds his/her marriage/life partner. In the same vein; it’s by the grace of God that both of you remain faithful to each other regardless of how beautiful or loveable any of you might be. Believe me, it’s not just a fact; rather, a fancy fact. In essence, I’m actually saying that if you fail to abide by the rule of God, you will definitely find your relationship in shambles.

Let me make this issue clearer. Some of the actions such as cheating or bickering we find ourselves in our respective marital relationships may not be as we planned or wished; it could be mysterious. And this aspect known as mystery remains the major reason we should endeavour to always be closer to God whenever we find ourselves in any marital relationship. Take for instance; if one gets married, he/she might wish to adore his/her partner for the rest of his/her life. But at a certain point in our marital life, we find ourselves acting silly contrary to our earlier decision; and you may never find out what actually prompted such unwanted act. This is why we must acknowledge the fact that there’re certain forces surrounding any marriage or marital vow. Let’s ride on!

An extramarital affair is an activity in which a married person cheats his/her marriage partner for the purpose of actualizing his/her selfish desire. Without mincing words, this aspect of marriage has been existing since the beginning of the world. Thus, it’s as old as the union itself.

First and foremost, the only way one can be free from this mess is to be contented with what he/she has. Secondly, you should also understand that the union was not by your making; thus, you’re bound to be faithful or grateful not only to your partner but to the progenitor of such sacred union.

The perfect key towards a home that’s free from any sort of extramarital affair is nothing but contentment coupled with prayers. You must continue to inform yourself that you’re satisfied with whatever you’re blessed with; be it your partner or material possession. Then such worthwhile attribute or idiosyncrasy is meant to be accompanied with regular prayers in order to withstand any possible temptation that may come on your way. Surely, temptation must set in; there’s no two ways about it, and you can never escape from it. In other words, it’s natural.

I want to let you know that mankind has a natural tendency to taste what he has never tasted before. This is why Economics recognizes that human wants are uncertain due to our natural quest to have what we’ve never had before. Thus, we must safeguard what we have jealously as if it’s the best among others. Such quality is simply known as contentment. I also wish to inform you that, contentment cannot work if we fail to dedicate our marriages to God.

For crying out loud, marriage has a finite rule/policy, and we must stick to it if we really want ours to be successful and fruitful. This is why maturity remains the most fundamental tool requires in a marriage. Yes, both parties are expected to be mature; maturity is one of the basic recipes when it calls for marriage. Mind you, that one is forty (40) does not imply that he/she is mature; thus, age is not directly proportional to maturity as it’s generally and popularly noted.

Brethren, we must endeavour to do this right so we won’t be smiling when we’re meant to pray because there’s time for everything. You shouldn’t personally invite moment of doom into a union founded by God Himself.

It’s high time we detested and destroyed these cankerworms that are setting our respective homes ablaze. Cheating is definitely evil and we must absorb that fact into our thick skulls. Think about it!

______________________

FDN NWAOZOR

frednwaozor@gmail.com

Madness

MADNESS: A SOCIETAL MONSTER


The term ‘madness’ could be used in many ways; but in this edition, our interest lies in the aspect of mental illness or degradation. Pardon me, I wish to begin with a short story.

One fateful day, I and three other young men, fellow executive members of a certain organization Oru Youths Platform (OYOPLA) which I happen to be the founder/leader were heading to a certain town in Oru in our private car to see a prominent personality; Oru is an ancient community that comprises of Oru East / West Local Government Areas in Imo State, Nigeria. Within five to six minutes drive which ushered in about ten kilometers (10km), we encountered three mad persons on the way. One of us, Mr. Charles Nlemeke (Financial Director) who was on the sterling couldn’t hold his breath; so he thought aloud, “Is like this town has the largest number of mad people in this community (Oru)?” The rhetorical question suddenly broke the silence that had lasted for over three minutes. Thereby, an uncontrolled unified laughter followed suit. But I maintained a slight smile. After some seconds, I bombarded the insinuation with another rhetorical question, “How sure are you that, those mad persons weren’t imported from your town?” Subsequently, another great laughter burst in. ”But, Presido might be right,” said the Director of Ethics, Mr. Longinus Onyebuchi who was trying to be on my side. Then, the Vice-President General (VPG) Mr. Joseph Ozor suggested that we go to one of our Legal Advisers for more clarification. According to him, the Legal Adviser would be in the right position to know the actual fact about the community. We all unanimously agreed to dance to the tune of the VPG.

Brethren, any reasonable person can figure out that the above conversation was a joke. We decided to laugh over the circumstance (madness) so it wouldn’t affect our respective psyches. Of course it shouldn’t have been a joking matter because ‘madness’ has become a very serious issue in our society. And, this is where the context of this lonely edition lies.

There are two distinct mood a certain mad person might belong to, which are violence and calmness; a mad person could be violent or calm. Pardon me, I wish to narrate another short story.

There was a day I was sitting at one of the joints situated at Wetheral road in Owerri; still in Imo State. I was very observant just as I had always being, as I was sipping my chilled drink. Suddenly I noticed that a certain mad man was walking in an opposite direction with one pretty young lady along the road. At their point of meeting, the mad man in question quickly hit the lady at her lips with one of his bare hands. Everyone around was shock by the incident. The lady sustained an injury on her lower jaw. We all began to sympathize with her. On the other hand, the mad man kept on moving as if he never did anything. Believe me, the scene was dramatic; but it wasn’t funny.

One of the men who was sitting with us called the lady and inquired from her if she had known the mad man, or had ever met him before. To me, that was a rhetorical question. Arrant nonsense; total ignorance coupled with stupidity! We frowned at such question that lacked an action word or verbal term. By His grace, I used the avenue to educate the man who tendered the silly question and also, everyone in the gathering. I let them know that the mad man was a typical example of a violent mad man. In other words, he was suffering from psychosis. And such persons are scattered all over the nook and cranny. Let’s ride on!

Whatever branch/mood a given madness belongs to, the cause could be natural, medical, spiritual, or physical. Let’s commence with natural causes.

The cause of a certain madness could be natural. That is, it can be caused by nature. And, this is where curse (spell) sets in. one may ask if ‘curse’ truly works. Yes, it actually works if the recipient of such curse is not innocent. Believe me, if you’ve wronged anyone in the past and never cared to seek for forgiveness and as well embrace total repentance, you must in one way or the other receive the consequence of such evil or ungodly act if the person places a curse on you. The person in question may not even care to place you under spell if he/she is truly a Christian. But whatever may be the case, I want you to acknowledge that, nature fights on behalf of the innocent whenever he/she is being hurt by someone. Frankly speaking, there’s too much power in nature.

Secondly, madness could be caused by medical/health problem(s). Some of the Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs) such as syphilis could lead to madness. If anyone is infected by any of them and refuses to go for adequate treatment, at a point or an acute level, it may result to psychosis (madness). So, an infection is also one of the causes of madness.

There is/are also spiritual means of madness. This is where ritualism/cultism comes in. For instance, if one is being initiated into a certain secret confraternity; and he/she was asked to carry out a particular ritual or sacrifice which he refused or failed, there is a tendency that the person would incur madness as an outcome of his rebellion/failure. Apart from madness, there are other repercussions the person may encounter. I’m of the view that the above words are enough to explain this paragraph. Note that one of the causes of madness, nature, mentioned above can also be classified under this (spiritual).

Above all, there is also a physical cause of madness. If one receives a bullet in his brain, it could be a pathway to madness if an adequate and urgent measure is not taken. More so, constant reading (studying) without adequate intake of food or absolute rest may also lead to psychosis. There are other physical activities that affect the brain such as incessant intake of hard drugs like cocaine and marijuana which are also possible means of madness.

All the causes of madness discussed above could be avoided; so one needs to be extremely careful because carefulness remains the best approach to it. A popular Igbo idiomatic expression says, “were ire gi guo eze gi onu.” Meaning, count your teeth with your tongue. Though sometimes temptation sets in; that is more reason we are bound to remain prayerful and faithful. Yes, that is the suitable key. Don’t forget, there’s no absolute or total cure for madness. Thus, “prevention is better than cure.” Another Igbo adage says, “agboja onye ara, ogayi akusi ntawu.” That is, if a mad person has been treated or cured, he/she would never stop thinking aloud at all times. ‘Thinking aloud’ is a situation whereby one indulges in self communication in a manner in which his/her voice sounds to the hearing of other people around. Thus, “prevention is better than cure.”

The Non-Governmental Organizations (NGOs) have a very vital role to play here. They ought to organize educative and inspirational seminars and workshops relating to madness, from time to time. On the other hand, the concerned government agencies should ensure that those mad people on our roads are consistently taken to a special home or psychiatric hospitals with the object of maintaining a serene environment.

Brethren, it’s time for break. Remember, ‘all work no play makes Jack a dull boy.” Perhaps it may lead to madness, not just dullness. Who knows? Think about it!

_______________________

COMR. FRED NWAOZOR

frednwaozor@gmail.com

Birthday anniversary Celebration

BIRTHDAY-ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATION: A WELCOME PHENOMENON!

In most developing nations, the mood of political cynicism and despair deepened tremendously. As a crime analyst and social crusader, these are bulk of catastrophic illusions culminated by bunch of feverish panoramic views which were solely initiated by a myopic telescope. Such fallacious ideas are the reactants of this insistent and perpetual product known as ‘treason’ which has been the order of the season. You’ll agree with me that, this unending cankerworm (treason) yielded the present reoccurring state of insomnia witnessed by many developing nations scattered all over.

On the contrary, a wise thinker considers the odyssey of his/her country and sees if he/she can render a remedy to any existing loophole(s). It’s obvious that such person must consider both the nourishing and devastating parts of the odyssey rather than, being one-sided as it is the case in the above phenomenon. And such examination or analysis will surely lead to a logical conclusion. This is what we, the analysts, tag as realism. Brethren, realism is a school of thought; one who belongs to such school, or a realistic person, recognizes and accepts the true nature of any situation and tries to deal with it practically. Above all, he embraces pessimism and optimism. Yes, it’s a paradox, but at the end, the latter must supersede the former.

At this juncture, I wish to draw your attention to the basic reality of life; we all were created for a purpose. And, that purpose is positive. Thus, no one was created to die or to be destroyed. If our various dreams are pursued with worthwhile and enormous effort(s) coupled with great passion and vigour, such dream/pursuit must surely be actualized or come to past. Let’s ride on!

Birthday is the anniversary of the date on which one was born. In other words, it’s the day that marks the completion of a particular span. That is, if you were seventeen by this time last year, then apparently you’re eighteen. Which means, you’ve clocked the adulthood and as well completed your eighteenth (18th) year span. In other words, you’ve accomplished a certain mission.

For over the years, millions of people have been seeing this phenomenon (birthday) as worthwhile whilst, many critics see it as an inconsequential gesture or are yet to embrace/acknowledge the efficacy of its existence. This difference between the members of the above groups has been generating a lot of dusts as a result of their surfeit of debate. On this note, I wish to use this avenue to earn my view on this reoccurring baseless debate that has been taking place in the absence of a judge or quizmaster. You can forward your response(s) after this edition if you wish to counter my forthcoming critique or single-minded opinion on this outstanding topic.

Unequivocally, as stipulated by the caption of the topic, birthday celebration is truly a welcome phenomenon. It’s a day that you have to take a second look at your life (journey) so far just as it was quoted by the famous philosopher of the blessed memory, Socrates “an unexamined life is not worth living.” Yes, one’s life ought to be constantly and consistently examined. On the close examination of your odyssey, the good side of it must surely call for celebration while, the other side (bad side) calls for adjustment or total transition of your life-style in regard to the affected phase (angle). You shouldn’t be rigid at all times/events. At a certain point or in some cases, you’ve to loosen up. Examination or cross-examination of your life will do you no harm. Honestly, it pays to indulge in such act.

Thus, such moment (birthday) is truly a moment of sober as it’s cited by various wise thinkers. I want to quickly remind you of something very crucial; there’s no span or life-span that does not have both the good and bad sides. Even the holy Bible says it all; “…He sets the time for sorrow and the time for joy, the time for mourning and the time for dancing…” (Eccl 3: 1-8).

At your moment of sober, if you fail to recognize the good side of your span, always remember that, there’s one which is constant; and that is ‘life’. If you don’t have anything to celebrate for or you’re so myopic to acknowledge that you’re still alive, kindly do so (celebrate) for the sake of your life. Frankly, there’s no good thing that would be better than life. Just as the Igbo people always say, “ndu bu isi.” That is, life is/remains the most important thing on earth, or to mankind. Surely, life is too precious.

So if you’ve been celebrating/acknowledging your birthday, then I wish to state here that, you’re one of those wise thinkers who closely consider the real purpose of their existence on earth. Believe me, such attribute is not unconnected to realism. For sure, like I said earlier; if you’re on this earth, or in this world, you’re here or were created for a purpose. And, that purpose is definitely positive. So even if you’re myopic to recognize that you’re still alive, you’re bound to appreciate that purpose for which you were created. Above all, you’ve to appreciate God for creating you or ensuring that you were created; It is a privilege that we should always remain grateful to. (Q.E.D).

Even in your sick bed; no matter how critical is the illness, the purpose for which you were created should continue to motivate you. Let it be your sole motivation. Thus, “you shall not die; you shall live to profess His goodness and mercy…”

Similarly, such demonstration (anniversary) is also required in the case of graduation, irrespective of the nature/level of the citadel of learning. That is, be it nursery, primary, secondary, tertiary or what have you, they all call for celebration. If you can’t celebrate with friends, do so with the members of your family. You can even celebrate within yourself. What matters most is the spirit of the celebration. So the euphoria must be there. Thus, the most important thing that matters in any celebration/jubilation, no matter how little it is, is that the celebrant(s) must be euphoric. Yes, there’s no two ways about it.

Don’t forget that anniversary is needed/necessary in any aspect of our worthwhile endeavours. For instance, a constant wedding anniversary celebration is really essential to any couple in question. Marriage is an everlasting institution, so any thing or day that results/marks the beginning of such mutual relationship automatically calls for celebration. Even if the marriage is yet to be fruitful, you’re bound to appreciate the fact that, the Almighty never fails.

Brethren, continue to celebrate because such attribute yields greater success or fruit. Mind you, celebration is not when one hosts a party; there’re several ways one can celebrate. Think about it!

______________________

COMR. FRED NWAOZOR

frednwaozor@gmail.com

twitter: @fdnnwaozor
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